Batman's Column

My Deer Parishionerz o St. Padre Pio Parish, 

It iz me, Batman, da rectory doggo! Apparently, my daddo iz a gigantic windbag and taked-ed up a lot o space! So guess who getz da short end o da stick?!? ME!!! But we haz 2 giv da people wut dey want! So witout further ado, an abrev.. an abrev.. a really shorto column about da readingz 4 2day. Doggoz and catz r often reflectionz o da mommoz and daddoz. If u hav a good and well behaved-ed doggo dere iz a good person behind dem. Unfortunately da opposite iz true 2! Bad behavior comez from peoplez not understanding o helping dere furry friendz navigate da world dey live in. I wuz lucky da I gotz my daddo and dat he had LOTZ o people who helped-ed him b a good one. It iz da same 4 humanz 2! We iz lucky dat we haz DA BESTEST DADDO IN ALL O CREATION - God! If we listenz 2 Him den we will bear good fruit. Wit His grace we become reflectionz o Him. Not only do we recognize our own sinfulness and weakness, we can, filled wit kindness, help udders. We just hav 2 hav heartz dat r open 2 God and listen 2 Him. We must luv da Lord and udders as He luvz us! We haz 2 hav more space in da bulletin so we can write betterer about Jesus! So don't be blind and fallz in da hole o sin. Open ur heartz and eyez 2 da will o God! 

God Bless (and stop da censureship o doggoz)!