Batman's Column

It iz me, Batman, da rectory doggo. I don't wish 2 b a negative doggo, but I haz 2 talk about someting important. I knowz dat dis weekend iz a special one 4 our country. I knowz dat dere r lotz o activities dat families partake in as a part o da 4th of July. BUT JUMPIN' JEHOSOPHAT KNOCK IT OFF WIT DA FIREWORKZ!!! I getz scared and I don'l likz dem ONE BIT! I knowz dat Jesus sayz 2 St. Paul dat, "My grace is sufficient for you, for power is made perfect in weakness.” However, St. Paul wuz NOT a doggo and didz not have sensitive ears! So don't b "[h]ard of face and obstinate of heart" lik da nation o Israel o tak offense lik dem folks from Galilee! Use sparklerz and snackoz instead! 

God Bless and Happy 4th o July (If you need me I will b lying down on da floor being hugged-ed by my daddo)! 

Batman, da rectory doggo .